Contractor Cuts
Join the ProStruct360 team on the Contractor Cuts podcast as we delve into the ins and outs of building and sustaining a thriving contracting business. Gain valuable insights and actionable tips from our experts who have successfully grown their own contracting company from the ground up.
Our show is dedicated to helping contractors like you unlock the secrets to increased profitability, efficient organization, and seamless processes within your company. Whether you're a seasoned professional or just starting out, our episodes cover key topics essential for your business growth and long-term success.
Make the most of your time between job sites by tuning in to our podcast and learn firsthand how to navigate the challenges of the contracting industry. Get ready to transform your business with valuable information that can potentially change the trajectory of your success.
Don't miss out on this opportunity to gain the knowledge and strategies you need to take your contracting business to new heights. Subscribe to Contractor Cuts today and empower yourself with the tools and insights to thrive in the industry.
Contractor Cuts
The Contractor’s Family Balance: Don’t Lose What You’re Building For
Clark and James explore how building a contracting business affects your family relationships and what you can do to protect the people who matter most.
• The dangerous moving goalposts of promising "once I reach this milestone, then I'll have time for family"
• How the transition from employee to owner creates new stress patterns in personal relationships
• Why staying silent about work stress actually harms your marriage
• The importance of working proactively on next week's jobs instead of fighting today's fires
• Setting clear work hour boundaries with clients through a Client Expectations Agreement
• Creating non-negotiable family time blocks that clients cannot interrupt
• Why waiting for the "perfect time" to prioritize family never works
• Recognizing when you might need professional help if work becomes an escape
If you're struggling to balance your business and family life, reach out to us for a free call to help identify where you can create better systems.
Join us January 11–13 in Nashville for the Chart the Course 2026 Planning Retreat. Sign up now and get three free coaching sessions before the event to finish 2025 strong and hit 2026 with a clear game plan. At the retreat, you’ll tackle systems, hiring, marketing, and leadership alongside ambitious contractors, leaving with a blueprint for growth. Spots are limited—visit prostruct360.com to learn more!
Have a question or an idea to improve the podcast?
Email us at team@prostruct360.com
Want to learn more about our software or coaching?
Visit our website at ProStruct360.com
Welcome to Contractor Cuts, where we cover the good, the bad and the ugly of growing a successful contracting company.
Speaker 2:Welcome back to Contractor Cuts. My name is Clark Turner and I'm James McConnell. Thank you, guys, for joining us this week. Today we are talking about a really fun topic, but I think probably one of the most important topics that I end up getting into a lot with guys in coaching that they don't realize is coming and it always ends up being a really good thing that we talk through which is, if you've got a spouse, if you've got a girlfriend, if you've got children, if you've got people in your life that you care about, how is their life being affected by your decisions in this company? I think we're going to dive deep into the work-life balance and that's you know. That's a kind of one of those sayings that people use all the time, but I think the goal of this is what are you sacrificing and who is sacrificing because you're trying to build this company? Um, and if you're listening to this, not started like thinking of starting your own or just starting, take this as, hey, I will need to make sure I'm setting my path the right way. Uh, if you've been doing this for a long time and your marriage is struggling, take this and listen to it and try to implement some stuff in terms of how you can press into it. I think one of the things that a lot of guys miss including myself in this industry is that we confuse the end goal and the journey. Right, it's once we get there, then right. And I think I've said this.
Speaker 2:One of the things that my wife and I have fought about in years past is I'm always like we're in a season. Once I get X, I'll be able to relax and be here more. Once we get this spot, we'll be good. Once I actually, you know, I need two more hires and then I can kind of sit back and we can go on vacations and relax and I'll be here more. And there's always yeah. But next season, yes, okay, we get, I make those two hires, yeah, but I got to fire this guy. Like, okay, I just can't, I'm going to keep grinding, Give me six more months to where it's always these moving goalposts in our relationship that I'm constantly just pushing further and further and further out of. I just got to burn the candle at both ends now. Then we'll be able to relax, right. And so today we're talking about that. We're talking about how to identify that, how to avoid that and how to step out of that dance if you were in the middle of it, because the the end goal, the why of why you're doing this, is usually and should be your family, right, like most people aren't starting construction companies or kind of backing into this industry and working in this industry just for fun. It's the end goal of this. Is financial freedom, is stability for my family, time spent with my kids, being an active father and an active husband, not just someone that pays the bills for them, and so that's what we're diving into today.
Speaker 2:Fun topic, light topic this is so lighthearted. Yeah, I think we have two different paths that we started on and we ended up at a very similar spot. I started a construction company at 24 and have continued through my 40s. You came in working for companies, trying to work your way up in them trying to, though you had the same work ethic as an owner. That's why you got to where you're at right Of, you weren't just putting in the minimum. You have always um.
Speaker 2:I love to hear from your perspective on being an employee at a at a construction company and then the transition into ownership, and then starting companies and then adding your first child into that and then continuing from there. That's pretty personal. Yeah, that's fine, let's pull up pictures of your kid and your wife and let's no. I love to hear a little bit that journey from the grind as an employee versus the grind as an owner. You have the same number of hours in a week. You honestly like as an employee, you you had some heavy responsibilities that you ended up getting into, uh, as you moved up, uh up with us and into kind of the upper management and then stepping into ownership. Um, did you feel a difference in those two things? Did you feel that? Do you feel like in the beginning, in your twenties, in early marriage, you were grinding and more company committed? Or was it like that was my job and I come home and I'm doing it Like, tell me, tell me about that. Like your, your early work, work years?
Speaker 1:Well, I wanted out of construction. By the time I came and interviewed with you, yeah, I'd been in, was doing a lot of labor, and then I was selling roofs for like one month, which was terrible, and then I was working for this commercial company.
Speaker 2:You got married when you were at the commercial company, right Like two years before, two to three years before.
Speaker 1:ProServe yeah, like two to three years before. So I was. I don't. Honestly, I like working, I like hard work, and it was never a until recently, like maybe the past two, three years, I didn't really generate an off switch and that was really fine initially, because there's um, when you're starting with a company and you kind of are wired like that, there is constant oh, here's like a new responsibility, cause we see that you can do that, here's a new responsibility.
Speaker 1:And somebody wired like that is like perfect, yes, I'm being recognized for like doing it and I'll take any of that I can get. Give me more responsibility, give me this, give me that. And so it wasn't like a oh, I'm done with work, so I'm turning, turning the switch off. It was like I'm done with work, but what else can I do to show that I'm still in this, that I'm in the game and, I think, for a long while? There's like a lot of novelty to that, and so that's what keeps me engaged. Is novelty. It really like until I started getting people under me, it was. It was pretty easy for me to see like what I needed to be doing.
Speaker 2:Yeah, once people started once I had full control of your plate?
Speaker 1:Yes, and like. Well, I mean, you know there's crews and stuff, but like, at the end of the day I can like go out, be on site, make sure that I address the things.
Speaker 2:And any issues that you had to deal with. You had full control of causing the issue, so you felt full responsibility in dealing with the issue. Yeah, totally.
Speaker 1:So in that again, for my emotional personality, that's like really, I really like that. Yeah, even if it's bad, I like knowing where the blame should be. Yeah, like that feels good in some way. No, um, so it wasn't really until people started coming under me that it was, uh, more heady like. Oh, I've, like I need space not to be doing anything but just to kind of think through some of this stuff. And so getting out of the field and spending more time and kind of the the ether is, I think, where that, the type of stress you're talking about, that you know can can hurt relationships, really started to become problematic for me, and to the point where I can't remember when it was.
Speaker 1:But there was one night and this is when I was living in the apartments uh in Woodstock there was one I couldn't sleep. It wasn't, it wasn't abnormal for me to like get up and get out of the house by like five, 30, six o'clock, but this one, this one morning I couldn't fall asleep and I left at like three, 30 to just head to the office, cause like there's no point in me doing anything right now, like I can't sleep and my wife calls me at like four, like right, as I'm pulling up to the office, she's like where are you? And I was like I'm at work and she's like that's a problem. And I was like I couldn't sleep. There's nothing. She's like that's a problem. So like I. I remember that, oh, I don't even know what all was going on. It was in the mix of, like different uh uh office personnel, project managers. Everything just seemed to not be jiving and it was like the only thing I can think to do is work.
Speaker 2:Yeah, well, and it was the first time that not first time, but it was the first season for you of having other people being responsible for other people, to where I think you carried heavier than anyone else. I've seen the responsibility of helping and taking care of other people, which is a great thing, but also you carry too much of that weight and that's just your personality, and that was something that I think we we worked through together in terms of like, cause I'm the opposite of that. I'm like I did my part sucks for them Right, and that was something that I think we worked through together in terms of like, because I'm the opposite of that. I'm like I did my part. It sucks for them and you're like I did my part. I can't believe they did that. I need to go fix it.
Speaker 2:And so then you went from a space of I have five things on my plate. I got rid of them. Two issues came up. It came on my plate. I issues came up, it came on my plate. I handled it to where you flipped it to where I have two things on my plate. I got rid of them.
Speaker 2:All of a sudden, five things went wrong, and now those are all on my plate, which is like now aha, I just, I just cleared my plate, I just got it all done, right. And so I think that is the stress, that again, this isn't necessarily marriage, but it was what led to stress in your marriage, right, it was the the. It went from controllable to where you can turn it off, cause you knew exactly where everything was, to uncontrolled. All of a sudden, you're at dinner with your wife and you get a text message from a client that's like there's people smoking weed in our house, right there's. There's stuff where it's like who, what, what, like what, and now, instead of sitting at dinner, you're outside on the phone trying to solve problems because other people made stupid mistakes, right. So I think that was a big transition for you.
Speaker 1:Yeah, and it's more like I don't think I'll ever be in a place where stuff doesn't like. Just coming in here today, multiple texts and emails that I'm like, ah, that are just on me. Now I can deal with it much better than I used to, but it's the.
Speaker 2:It's a chain around your neck until it's gone. Yeah, Like.
Speaker 1:I need some type of resolution, at least knowing that there's something moving towards resolution. And I think that's like I don't know. I think that's just the hardest part for me of this whole company ownership type thing is feeling like there's not anybody else that's going to move this in the direction towards resolution, because that's what it always feels like. It's just like you are resolving whatever's not resolved, yeah, and there's always a million things to resolve if it's not something that is pressing like a client issue. There's insurance stuff and making sure everybody has their paperwork and making sure that when you do your quarterly reconciliations, that everyone has is up to date, and it's like there's always, always, always something to be doing.
Speaker 2:Did you follow that paperwork that you had no clue was supposed to be filed with the state back in January? Yeah, no, what, yeah what paperwork.
Speaker 1:Yeah, so I feel like I'm on a on a trail. I've lost the beginning and I don't know where we're going right now.
Speaker 2:So well, I think what, what, what we're trying to cover too is like the stress of being an employee in your twenties, and how did that affect your marriage verse. You're now in a, in a totally different season, with a child that you've had for a while now, you know, 18 months, year and a half, so you've you've kind of transitioned into. It's not just I'm sorry to my wife, but now I'm affecting the livelihood and the experience and the forever emotions of a human. Yeah, when let's start in the beginning, though, like you're talking about, like that transition when you were just married but taking on more responsibility, moving up in the company, how did that affect your marriage? And if it didn't, that's okay. Where was your marriage suffering from those times and what did you do about it? And what should have you done? If you could rewrite some of the 4am going into the office and your wife waking up by herself? Yeah, what would have you done differently in those?
Speaker 1:stages. I think that's a good note because that's, I think, you got me back on the track here. Through counseling, through conversations with my wife, with my family, I think I've come to an understanding that I should have known a long time ago. But I'm very performance-based and the early stuff, when you're not an employer and you're an employee, there is, or should be, constant recognition of the positive things that you're doing and then a redirection of the things that you could be improving on. And for whatever part of my performance in life is receiving criticism well, even though no one likes criticism, yeah, but if you're performance based, you need to be able to understand and recognize when obviously everyone has things that they can improve on.
Speaker 1:So why shouldn't I be any different? You should take everything that is said to you by people that you trust. As you know, there's there's gotta be some truth in here. How do I change? But when you become the employer and you're running your stuff, uh, there's very little of that, if any. There's not a uh, your wife can tell you, oh, you're doing great and you know how are things. It just doesn't. It's not the same as having somebody be like, hey, here's what you need to be doing better or hey, this is really positive. Let's focus more on this, because you just don't feel like that person really understands what you're really talking about.
Speaker 2:And an employee looks at you and says, oh, this is just who he is. I'm not like employees don't give feedback, like coworkers do, or like a boss, like an employee that's underneath you. If you are not giving them the support they want, that's a character flaw in you and their mind Like that's just who James is, so I'm not. Like I'm not gonna, like he just is a sucky boss, so I'm not gonna. And so you have like this smiley face when you meet with the guy and then fast forward six months and he quits and he's like well, I quit because you just are a terrible boss. It's like what? Yeah, that was like when did we talk? Like I didn't even know, that that's new news to me.
Speaker 2:Like, and I think that not that they, anyone was like you're a terrible boss, but like there were some guys that that left, that we won't name, that had issues with you and that drove you nuts. Because it's like I didn't even know and I did everything and I did this for you and I did this, and that's not fair and that's not. Anyways, I think, getting off track again, but getting back onto it, how do you, how does that manifest in your personal life? Like how, with that level of stress, that kind of ticked up when you started transitioning into upper management, how did that show itself in your personal life, in your marriage, in your relationships, and what do you think you did wrong and what do you think you did right?
Speaker 1:Wrong. What I did wrong was I. I just didn't. I wasn't being introspective enough about what I wanted out of the journey. Yeah, and it was just more based on what came across, what came in front of me. Yeah, and how could I take that and do whatever with it? I didn't spend much time thinking about the direction that I wanted to be going and what would be fulfilling for me personally, and not that that is everything that you enjoy and that, like you feel, like the people around you are bringing life to what you're doing.
Speaker 1:I don't think that as much anymore. I think that it's. It is really important that you feel connected to the work that you're doing. Because when I, when I don't feel a connection to work, when I don't feel like what I'm doing is important connection to work, when I don't feel like what I'm doing is important F it, yeah, like I, it's not bringing life and, in fact, it's just sucking life out of me. And that was the, the, the, the apartment when we were there, for whatever reason, that was a whatever reason, that was a uh, that was just all life taking time Does.
Speaker 2:Do you identify that first? Or does your wife identify it first, like when that stuff happens when you get to that place, is she? Is she raising a flag saying hey, you're, you're absent, you're, you know you're. You're not here with me when you're sitting here with me, or is it you feeling it though, because you're still can perform and be here, so you're feeling in the background?
Speaker 1:Yeah, it's the background, it's, I think probably most guys that have partners or whatever deal with this, and it's not allowing your spouse into the pain, into the struggle, because you want to protect them from feeling your energy. Yeah, and that's probably the biggest mistake, because my wife is very capable, very strong, has great advice, has great insights and I kept her from being able to be part of the solving of some of my struggles. Yeah, and a lot of that is based in the performance because, like you have to you, you need to be able, you need to be able to shut the door on something and, like, know that you can pick that up tomorrow, that you're not going to solve this issue, that this is a work thing and it's not a life thing, and you need to shut the door and then tomorrow you can open the door again and begin dealing with it again. But it is not, it's not a life thing. You need to let that thing go for a couple hours and have your life.
Speaker 2:Well, I think also great point, what you, what you just said is there's a lot of guys say, hey, I don't want to bring work home with me, so I'm not going to talk about it here, when in fact they brought it home with them and talking about it, we'll let them release it, right, like?
Speaker 2:my wife sometimes, but when I bring it and when I don't bring it home with me, quote unquote because I'm just not going to tell my wife how I'm about to tears on a job site earlier today because I was just screaming at this crew that just absolutely screwed me Right, whatever it is, and I get home like hey, babe, how was your day Right? And I'm just don't want to deal with it and don't want to talk about it. I'm still bringing it home because I'm sitting on the couch with her watching a show, just in a different world, thinking about it. I'm not engaging, I'm not looking at her, we're not having a conversation. I'm just thinking through what happened today. I'm so pissed off, but I don't want to talk about it. I want to leave work at work. Yeah, and it's like you did it. You did, you brought it home and and that's here, it's the other girlfriend on the couch.
Speaker 2:Yes, and so the the whole like oh, I don't want to burden her with this, that's not burning burdening her, you are burdening her by just sitting there brooding. Yes, and you're making it happen. What's?
Speaker 1:wrong Nothing.
Speaker 2:Yep, it's. It's amazing because most males are fixers. I want to fix it. You give me a problem. I'm going to tell you a way to solve it.
Speaker 2:Um, and most females again, not all on either side uh, are, hey, let's hear it. I'll just want to connect and hear it, right, and so you know, if my wife tells me an issue that she's having at work, I'm telling her seven ways to fix it. Well, what if you did this? How about you do this? And I don't want that. And she doesn't either. Right, it's not my job to fix it, and this is my job to listen. And I'll ask her that. Right, I'll say, hey, is this a? Do you want my help fixing it or do you want me to listen to you? Right, but vice versa, when I'm sitting there, I'm like, I don't want, like give me an answer.
Speaker 2:She just wants to hear what's going on in my world, right, and so I think that's one of the big things in terms of you're on an Island in this industry, right, it's hard to do this by yourself. Even if you have a partner, it still feels isolating Sometimes. Partner in business, it feels isolating sometimes. And it's one of those things of how do you invite your wife into that conversation, to where she's not carrying the burden, but she's there with you, holding your hand, being with you, understanding where you're at, because that's emotional connection. That's that's being emotionally connected to them, is letting them know where you're at, even if it's stupid, even if it's bad.
Speaker 2:And I'm listen, I'm pot calling, cut a black. I'm terrible at this and I've learned over the years. Hopefully I'm better than I was five years ago, and five years ago was better than I was 10 years ago. But being able to have that discussion where I'm not just complaining about work, I'm not just complaining about people, but I'm telling them, about telling her about my feelings, like God, it really, just like it. Really I was disappointed in this guy and, honestly, like it made me question if I'm even good at this. Like if you can say that out loud to your wife you're going to be taken care of usually, like it's going to change. Being able to verbalize stuff like that is going to change your dynamic with her as well as your trust in her, trusting that she's going to give you the response that you need.
Speaker 1:Yeah, I think, for I think for me, the thing that I kept finding was and kind of why I stopped wanting to share is she? You know, she might ask me how I'm doing, but I get there's probably guys out there that can connect with this. When I start talking about the thing, I pretty quickly emotionally get right back to that spot when it initially happened.
Speaker 1:And so the conversation goes from how was your day? It's like it was Tommy and this guy's here and this, and by the end of it I'm like and I'm like well, what are we even doing?
Speaker 2:What are we doing? What does she do? When you, when you amp up, does she have like a, a sign to calm you down?
Speaker 1:No, it's like um, it's what do you do with that guy? He, I'm like, I'm right back in the moment. I'm with the person.
Speaker 1:That has nothing to do with the situation and you're screaming at her about it and it's like that's what pulls you out, is like you see this person that you're talking to and like the glaze falls off and they're looking at you like okay, and you're like sorry, I just went right back. It's like, nah, you know, I don't know how. So, anyway, that's like the has been kind of. The key for me is going being asked the question how's that going? How's your day? Having to sit with it and actually explain how I'm feeling, not what happened, not the details of the thing Like those are so less important than, like, the big picture.
Speaker 1:I felt completely out of control about what's happening. I feel like I've been trying really hard, I've been working on myself to try and handle these situations better, and it just doesn't feel like I'm making progress. And then that's when my wife jumps in and says I need to tell you about some of the progress that I've seen. Yeah, and like hearing that from somebody on the outside, and almost every time I end up feeling better about the situation because she's bringing a perspective that I had forgotten, I've discounted because that's my job, you know, and that's like kind of like the easy decision deferment for someone that's a performance person is like you did this so well. That's my job. Like you know, that's what I got to do. You know that's my job.
Speaker 2:Hey, I'm just a fixer. You know that's my deal. I'm just amazing. I got such a high bar for myself.
Speaker 1:So did I answer that? No, that's good.
Speaker 2:No, that's good. That's good you did, you did. We're focusing a lot on James on this one Cause. Next week, uh, my wife is coming on the podcast to talk about my problems, so it'll be great.
Speaker 1:It'll be fine.
Speaker 2:If she, if she shows up, we'll see she. She probably will take it three to four hours of all my issues, but anyways, I appreciate you sharing some of that stuff. Let's, let's, let's keep going. The one of the biggest things that I see when I, when I'm coaching guys and I see this, I think if we're looking practical in your life, you know, in anyone who's running construction jobs and companies, the better their relationship is with their wife usually depends on when they're working on. What that means is today. Am I working on yesterday and today's problems, or today, am I working on next week and the week after his problems? If I can be proactively working, setting up schedules, putting out next week's fires before they come up, organizing my jobs, I am then able to be more present at home. If I'm working on what happened yesterday and today, when tomorrow happens, I got 17 fires that pop up because I didn't think about it, I didn't do pre-construction walk with this client, I didn't do the like, I didn't do a selections workbook and now my tile guy standing there with no tile. I didn't like, I didn't start proactively working through my jobs ahead of time to where today, every single day, day over day, for the last three years has been. I'm dealing with today's fires that are 17 to 20 fires and so, babe, I said I'd be home at five. It's 830. And I probably won't get home till 10. Cause I've got to do all this stuff Right. I think that is on a on a more basic but bigger picture picture where it starts right With messing up your relationships at home. Not being there for the kids' games, not being a present person at home oftentimes is a systems problem, is a I don't organize my day and look forward to planning next week because I don't have fires today. So I'm going to start laying out next week's progress of what's happening on my job sites. So then by next week there's no fires and what I plan to do I can do and I can go home at five because I'm done. So I think that's kind of small basic laying out systems to where we're not working for today, we're not working for yesterday, but we're working for the next two to three weeks, planning out, working ahead, having the time, having the space and capacity to write the estimates, to not be constantly just burning the candle at both ends. How do we get ahead of doing that? And I think that's one of the big things I see when guys come into coaching. That's what I'm trying to fix. Number one that's what we're working on of I want to project out in the future what we're doing. If you're dealing with what's happening tomorrow, we're too late. We got to be dealing with what's happening next week. I think that's number one. I think one.
Speaker 2:I remember one a guy that was in coaching that came through here. I might've told the story before, but we one of our coaches was on a call with him while he was driving and his wife leaned over and was like hey, I don't know what you're doing, but like I've never seen my husband this relaxed in my life, like I've never thank you. Like it was a, it was a coaching call that he forgot about. He was in the car driving somewhere with his wife and had our coach on speakerphone and she was just like I don't know what, what is happening at the work, but keep doing what you guys are doing. Because this guy is a different human at home and it's because he wasn't waking up at 4 am to put out fires. He wasn't waking up at 12 o'clock saying I didn't send that estimate. He goes to his laptop at 1230 am to write up an estimate, but instead it was organized and the fires are still going to happen, but we're dealing with two to three fires, not 17 to 18 fires. So can we work ahead to try and keep us in our brains engaged at home because there's not fires popping up every single evening? Because tomorrow I didn't plan for? I think that's that's number one. I think that's a big one.
Speaker 2:I think one other thing that that if we're trying to implement stuff today, if you're listening to this and saying, listen, I need to get my life together, I need to get my marriage better, I need to commit to do what I'm doing, do what I commit to doing.
Speaker 2:I think the CEA that we have is the first step for you. I think if you lay out to a client, before you get started, your expectations of them and what they should expect out of you, and lay out exactly that, I think one of my favorite lines in the entire CEA is these are our work hours. I'm here eight, 30 to five, monday through Friday. Call me anytime you want, text me anytime you want. During those hours I'm here for you. But this is a three-month project for you, so it's super intense for the next three months. I've been doing this for 20 years and I plan to continue doing it for the next 20 years, and so this is my day in and day out, so I can't work nights and weekends on your projects. I'm working nine to five nights and weekends on my family's. I need to recharge my battery, so you you have a hundred percent of me during the week, so is that fair for me to ask? We keep most of our communication Monday through Friday.
Speaker 1:Oh yeah, totally get it.
Speaker 2:Totally get it. No, that makes sense. I love that that you guys do that right. I hear that all the time. Fast forward three weeks, clients calling you on Saturday. Hey, I'm thinking about what if we did this with the flooring? And it's like, hey, hey think about it some more.
Speaker 1:Let's talk on Monday.
Speaker 2:Send me an email. Remember this, what we talked about. Uh, you know this is family time. If you could shoot me an email on Monday, I'll get to it when I sit down. And if we tell that, we tell clients that we say don't text, don't call, send an email over the weekend, cause I'm not going to be checking those till Monday morning.
Speaker 2:If your house is on fire and my example I always use if we are buying paint Monday morning and Sunday afternoon you change your mind on paint color. Call me, that's okay. Don't, don't make me buy a thousand bucks worth of paint that we're going to have to change. Send me a text, make sure we get that confirmed. Say Clark, don't buy the paint tomorrow morning. That's that's. That makes sense. If you're trying to figure out what color carpet you're doing in three weeks from now, send me an email. We'll talk Monday. And every single time clients sit here and say that that's great, that makes so much sense. I I've never, have you ever had pushback on hours outside. I think we had one investor was like I'm only in town on Saturdays, can we meet then? And we talked to the project manager and was like how do you feel about meeting him on Saturdays. If you don't want it, we'll say no to this job Outside of that.
Speaker 1:I've never had pushback on that schedule Because people know that that's reasonable.
Speaker 2:Yes, people understand in that moment.
Speaker 1:Yes, before we start the job, it's reasonable when it starts affecting their life. I can't sleep because I'm trying to think about what's happening next. And that's when they want to reach out to you. Then it's not in their head and if you haven't had that conversation, you haven't set the boundaries. Their understanding of contractors is that they'll be Johnny on the spot, ready to take your call morning, noon, night.
Speaker 2:I am your concierge, how you say so. Yeah, I think that is the having the number one, the CEA, in place, where we're talking about work hours and what's OK and what's not OK, getting them to sign the agreement in writing that they've signed that those are the times that they can contact me. Yeah, and then number two, how do we set up your processes to where you have office hours consistently? I want your Monday through Friday fairly consistent. What we do on Mondays is site visits. Tuesdays are office days. Wednesday, thursdays are free, do stuff in the field. Friday's half day in the office.
Speaker 2:If we can get a set week like that to where there's a rhythm Now it changes weekly sometimes, but there's a rhythm to your weeks Then I'm now not saying now I'm not visiting a job site on Wednesday, and then two more job sites on Thursday for all for estimates, and then Friday I've got a full day packed but I haven't thought about when I'm writing that estimate. Well, now I've got three estimates to write and it's Saturday morning and I'm choosing that over going to breakfast with my family. Um, when we? You know there's a lot of those systems that we try to put in place when you come into the coaching program of hey, when I, when you schedule an estimate, we're putting two blocks on your calendar, one for the estimate and one to write it up, but two time blocks on your calendar for that period when, when you go on site.
Speaker 1:Hey, maybe, maybe you're really good at compartmentalizing and you can say, oh, you know what, I've lost some time this week. Saturday morning I'm going to wake up a little bit early, I'm going to get X, y and Z done. Uh, for some people that's not really an option. Like the working on that thing Saturday morning is going to kind of set the tone for the rest of your weekend and, uh, maybe not the best idea, but like I can't say that some people would actually be like I, I can set boundaries, I can work a little bit in the off hours, I can do some work at night.
Speaker 1:Uh, because I really good with boundaries, I'm good with putting things down. I just know the things that I have to get done. Yeah, great, you're the. You can make those decisions for your life. Yeah, for me, I kind of know how I'm built a little bit and there's things that I can do now that I couldn't do five years ago in terms of compartmentalizing. But I'm still an emotionally reactive guy that can end up in a mood because of something that is not I'm not going to need to deal with until, you know, three days from now, but it has affected me now Also putting on my consultant hat with contractors.
Speaker 2:Even if they can compartmentalize, even if they can do that really well, even if that's just their norm and they can kind of fit things in, that's great for you. There's no scalability in your company that way. You can't hire a PM and train him to work Saturday morning sometimes when he needs to right. We got to have a systematic way that your company and your time runs, that we can train someone on. That can come in aside, aside beside you, and run jobs with you and in your company and be your, your project manager hire. If we don't have that schedule set up, how are you going to train them Like, oh, we just do this whenever we, we, whenever you have space. Well, you got me till five and I'm going home Like you're. You're not paying me to work nights and weekends, I'm not doing that man. And so all of a sudden, that hire comes in and they're underperforming because they're not following how you do things and how you do things you can't ask an employee to do because you are burning the candle at both ends as an owner Right and so like, if you trying to scale this company and grow it beyond just yourself. This is minimum stuff you got to get in place before bringing someone on much less to save your marriage and family and and free time and sanity. I think that's, that's a, that's a big one, I think.
Speaker 2:The other thing I would, I would suggest doing too, if this is hitting home, it's like, yeah, I don't, I don't, I don't spend enough time with my family. Great, this week we're going to, we're going to have a block for us. My, my girls dance Monday through Thursday and on Saturday, so we have Friday and Sundays off. So for us, friday night's, my family night period. You, if you try to call me after about four, 30 on a Friday, you will not get me. I promise Period Period. Uh, that's just what we do. We do, you know, either Friday nights we do that, saturday after dance, we usually do homemade pizzas, like we've got our, our, our set, stuff that we do as a family and you're not getting that. Like there's nothing you can do to get ahold of me in those times. Honor, that do that.
Speaker 2:And here's, here's the worst part that I remember from back in the day when I was trying to grow my company, I would be doing something with Esther. My wife and I would be not mad that I was there at the movies, but I'd be like I really wish I was at the office. I really I got so much and you just got to shove that down and ignore it. Because that is where, once you start engaging and enjoying those moments, that is the most important, and you mentioned this in passing a second earlier in this podcast. But if that is you, if you can't quit work, if you can't enjoy your wife, enjoy being a father, enjoy life in general, and all we do is grind at work, go see a therapist. Like there is no better thing you can do for your company than to get healthy mentally. Uh, to to see a therapist, cause that will end you, that will burn you out. You, you, you're not Mark Cuban, you're not someone that's going to build a uh, you know.
Speaker 1:Mark Cuban season counselor.
Speaker 2:I bet he does too. But I'm saying like, don't be, like I'm not fighting you, I'm not fighting you.
Speaker 1:I'm just, I'm just thrown in there. It's for the podcast.
Speaker 2:Perfect, thank you. No, that's good. The you're not going to be a billionaire. Like it's not like a rise and grind mindset, we're just going to you know, or that guy. That's like you know, my, my first day is from 4am to 8am and my second day is from 8am to noon. It's like cool and that's going to burn people out and that's not real. Like that's not reality. You're not. You're not going to have healthy or happy relationships If that's how you live your life permanently.
Speaker 1:You know what I've also heard on separate. One of them was when we went to Michigan and the guy was talking about yeah, but when I'm with my kids, I'm with them. I put my phone down and I'm like right there with them and I've heard somebody else talk about it like that and it's like great, but it's not. You're not going to build the relationships you want with the most important people in your life by just giving. Just giving them the weekend yeah. What about their day at school? What about your kid's day at school? That day? Yeah. And what about your wife's day or week with the kids? You know there's all sorts of things like you need to be present for life and it doesn't just happen on the weekends.
Speaker 2:Yeah, your wife and kids aren't an appointment. Yeah, you know, your job is the point. Like you're it isn't, like it will fit that in on Thursday the 11th and we'll do like, no, that's, that's, you've got it flipped around. I think one one point of this too, is like there is a spot to where you you look back and say, man, I've done it wrong. Man, do that often. Look back often and look back at how, what your relationship looks like.
Speaker 2:A lot of guys bury their head in work because they don't like their wife, they don't like being at home. Okay, so don't bury like, deal with that. Go see a therapist, go to the couples therapy, go figure out why you don't like being at home, because you probably don't like yourself at home. Yeah, for real. So I think that's like start flipping that around. You know, I think, like I said in the beginning of this, my problem was always it's babes. Give me six months and babe in, by next year I should be here, and so we'll be able to enjoy it today. Plan a vacation today, like it's not a. We're going to get to this season then, cause it doesn't get easier.
Speaker 2:Growing a company gets harder and it's more demanding and more people you hire, the more people demand your time, and so it's not going to get any easier than it is today. Even if maybe I'll have more money next year, who cares Like? You don't need to go to the Bahamas for for a vacation stay. Stay in town, have a staycation at your own home, like just take time off, be with your family, invest in those relationships. It is something that absolutely you have to do.
Speaker 2:If you feel like you're hamstrung with your job, if you feel like I have to do this, we'll do that next week. Give me a call and I'll walk you through it. I will help you identify from the outside what you, when we can find space and how we got to organize this differently. That will be a free call. I'm not trying to sell coaching on that. I would love to help you with that, but what we need to do is realize why we started these companies, why we're doing what we're doing and what are the actual priorities in our life, and make sure that those are what we're striving for today, not when I get there. Then I'll do that. Anything to add, no, all right. Well, next week we're talking with my wife about all of my flaws, which will be fun in the following week.
Speaker 1:I've got your therapist coming in, so we'll talk to Phil's. Got a lot to talk about.
Speaker 2:I can't wait to meet him. No, but no, I appreciate you open up about your personal life on this. I think it's super helpful. But yeah, keep doing what you're doing. You're a good dad.
Speaker 1:Oh, my daughter has a broken leg right now, so I saw that.
Speaker 2:I saw. I told her not to backtalk you, but at 18 months you got to learn young.
Speaker 1:What happened for real she was. We were going up the stairs to go to bed and she's climbing the stairs and then like stops, turns around and wants to come down. So she's coming down, she can walk and she's kind of learning. She's like holding the railing and just kind of slips on the step to the landing. So it's not even a big fall and I catch her. But her left foot plants before I catch her and she got what they call a toddler's fracture. Oh, and you can't even see it on an x-ray. So I don't know if it's real, but she has a full leg cast.
Speaker 2:She just learned how to walk and now she is hobbled and she can't walk.
Speaker 1:So it's like is he frustrated with it? She was initially. I think I'm projecting more on her because now you got a carrier everywhere.
Speaker 1:Well, it's that like we went from her walking, yeah, and being independent, to like needing to be carried everywhere again. But when I think about myself, like if I'm in a full leg cast and I'm hampered, I'm like I can't think of a worse thing for me than to be like immobile or like hampered in that way, and I'm like, oh, that would suck. Oh, that would suck man. So I'm, I'm more frustrated than her Poor girl.
Speaker 2:Well, I hope she gets better soon. She will All right. Guys Talk to you next week. Bye, bye.
